(This video has nothing to do with the PSA, I just like it and I thought it would make digesting my rant easier!)
So… as I was riding home the T this evening I found myself in an unenviable situation: I didn’t have my iPod. I never ride the T without it. In fact, it’s so essential that I actually have 3 backup iPods in strategically placed locations to prevent situations like the one I had this evening (if only I was as careful with my keys, right amigo?)…
Anyway, without the benefit of Aventura, Zion I, The Bravery and Don Omar . . . I was forced to listen to the insipid conversation across from me . . . the whole experience led to the following observations that I thought I would share:
- Observation #1: For the love of God, please stop talking like you’re from the Hills. Seriously, stop making statements and ending them like they are questions. Actually overheard on the T: Like, O-M-G she was like totally wearing like, the ugliest outfit? This is not a question. It’s a poorly structured statement. There is not need to end it with that vacuous inflection that would suggest a question. Furthermore, the statement came from a young woman wearing skinny jeans and ballet flats.
- Observation #2: I get the skinny jeans are “in” but they’re not for everyone. Trust me.
- Observation #3: Ballet flats are cool, but should be the kind that are meant to be worn outside. Real ballet shoes just look silly. And probably shouldn’t be worn with skinny jeans unless you are built like Kate Moss. And trust me, you aren’t. (I’m not either, don’t get me wrong, but for that very reason, I don’t wear skinny jeans and ballet flats).
- Observation#4: If you are wearing unflattering skinny jeans with ballet flats, you probably shouldn’t be commenting on other people’s outfits… and if you are…
- Observation #5: “like” should only be used once in a sentence. Seriously. Stop it.
- Observation #6: On another note, shaved eye-brows are apparently back in style. I approve…. Believe dat.
- Observation #7: Idem re: the frohawk.
- Observation #8: I think I need another back-up iPod to prevent rants like this one from occurring again.
Listen, I’m not trying to offend anyone here. Think of me as your good friend who’s just looking out. I did this for you a while back with the whole Uggs thing, and weren’t you kind of glad I did?
Sigh. Anyway, to end on a positive note, I leave you (or I guess I started you) with a video of Aventura performing for President Obama. Anthony (the lead singer), is adorable (noting his resemblance to a certain SS, of course) and his brother Henry is totally rocking the frohawk! I can’t wait to see these guys next month in Boston!
